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You feel embarrassed, shamed even, notonly of who you are, but because you sneak around too. You feelhumiliated because you're afraid to stand up and be who you are.*A sob caught in my throat. I tried to cover it up by pretending it wasa cough, but Ronnie apparently caught it. "You okay hon?" she asked,her brows going up in alarm. When I didn't answer for a moment, shewent on, "Don't be sad that you won't be sleeping with your date. Ifyou two like each other, there'll be plenty of time for that later." Yes, yes, of course," I mumbled, trying to avoid a conversation. *Itsamazing how she gets things to totally wrong, yet seems to see rightthrough me anyway.*She looked at me dubiously, so I closed my eyes and she went back towork. I continued to think.*Stop being a fool. Be what you are and like yourself. You're not abad person. Why do you treat yourself like one?* I knew the answer, ofcourse. I was projecting onto myself how I thought my family andsociety would judge me if I. He enjoyed visiting the local villages whether on foot or in the car. He the indoor swimming pool on site and the pleasant coastal walks to the north of the beach. Bill wasn’t particularly brilliant at cooking so barring breakfast, he spent a lot of his time eating from the facilities on site. Most of all, he enjoyed the evening entertainment in the park’s own clubhouse, which was open solely to it’s holiday residents. It included several activities early on for the older folks and the c***dren, which progressed to live cabaret acts and loud music the later the evening progressed. He sat in the same corner of the room and being a young man on a bit of a 'mission', did glance at some of the younger females in the room. None of which gave him a second glance. He wasn’t particularly surprised by this as he was a little shy with girls but still a little disappointed. Things weren’t looking brilliant for Bill’s initial plans of seeking female company on holiday. Whilst it was only the.
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